We need to stop chasing for our “other half” people, because we are not halves.

I want to stop feeling like a failure, or not completely successful, just because I haven’t found “the one.” I want people to stop telling me I am better off being single for now and then finding “the one” in my 30s. Stop planning my life around finding this mysterious “one.” My life is so much more than that. 

I don’t need to get married to be successful. I don’t need to have kids to be successful. I just need to love myself, take care of myself, and create my own journey. These are the things that define me, and lead to my happiness and overall well-being.

Relationships are distracting. Another person can take all your focus away from yourself. Often times we become so engulfed in pleasing the other person and genuinely caring for their needs that we forget who is number one. The number one person shouldn’t be anyone but yourself.

Sometimes relationships can take our lives and twist it into a different direction. This can hinder our priorities. Relationships are beautiful because they aren’t meant to last forever, and even if they let you down, they teach you invaluable lessons. You don’t need them to last forever to be successful. 

Think of relationships as train rides. You are a passenger and the train is your significant other. We know where the trains route and purpose before getting on and we know where we are supposed to get off. We know our stop is coming up and we will eventually part ways from the train. But we enjoy the time we have together until we both reach our separate destinations. But sometimes in relationships we get so distracted by the train or the people on it, we miss our stop. We lose sight of what path we were on before the train came. Even though the train is helping you get to your stop, it’s not meant to help you forever. It has a part in your journey and provides an easy route, but it’s not meant to stay with you forever. You will eventually exit the train, and it will go on without you, and you without it. If you lose sight of where you were going along the way or get caught up in the ride, you will find yourself at the end of the line. You will be forced out of the train and alone. If we can be more consciously aware of what the end is, we would not get so fixated.

You have to remember your stop and your purpose. You will meet people along the way, and they might help your journey go smoother, but not everyone is supposed to go to the same stop as you. At least not physically, mentally the lessons they teach us will stick with us forever. Their place on your journey serves a certain purpose, but they need to get to where they were going, and so do you. Don’t lose sight of your stop or your purpose.

When we lose focus of our needs and desires, this is when we lose ourselves. As much as you want to modify your life to fit another persons schedule, it is just not of our time. We are constantly moving and evolving. We want the next best thing and we want to climb the ladder to get their. We do not want to people around who don’t share our ambition and the people who share our ambition are going to different stops.

What happens if you stay on the train because you think you can’t survive without it? I know it’s scary to get off by yourself, but I can promise you that it’s worth it. The train will never complete you. Another person will never make you feel whole. You are supposed to do that on your own. Accept the fact that people will come in your life when they are needed, but ultimately it’s about you fulfilling your own desires.

You are enough on your own, you do not need someone to complete you. Enjoy what you have when you have it, and when it leaves, appreciate that it served its purpose, and let it go.

Being whole on your own it the best feeling in the world.